Imagine this scenario:
You are struggling with something going on in your life.
You have looked and tried to figure out what is going on yet you can’t.
You need another set of eyes on this to see something you can’t see.
No one around you gets the spiritual element to life’s challenges.
There’s no one you can really talk to about this.
But you know some Facebook groups that have heaps of like-minded people in them.
You aren’t keen on asking complete strangers, but where else do you find like-minded women to answer a burning question?
After some deliberation, you take a breath and post a question hoping someone can give you some insight or a clue as to what is going on so you can understand it.
You may be someone who has never done this yet I’m sure you have seen it.
There is an array of well-meaning responses.
Some really helpful.
Some not so helpful, but with good intentions.
There is one response, amongst the good and well-meaning responses, I am seeing repeatedly pop up a lot that is causing me great concern.
In fact it is bothering me so much that I can no longer stay quiet about it.
I’m seeing it so often now that it almost seems to be the new spiritual trend.
Like a new badge of honour, for some spiritual seekers, to wear by those who promote this thinking.
And that is “you don’t need anyone else to help you with this, the answer is in you.”
The energetic message that pours off of it is, you don’t need anyone to help you, find it within yourself, on your own.
I am not only seeing this advice in Facebook comments.
I’m seeing blogs written on it titled how “you don’t need a mentor, you have all the answers yourself”.
I enrolled in a course last year and nearly every lecture we were told, you don’t need anyone else, you don’t need to attend workshops, you have all the answers within you.
I know it is all well meaning and there is an element of truth in it.
The answers are all within us.
But the way this is coming across is you are meant to do it on your own.
Without any support, without a sisterhood.
Blog are being written saying forget mentoring, it’s all within you.
Why is this something that has crept under my skin so badly?
It is sending a message of isolation.
Because women are not designed to do it on their own.
Our way of processing events in our lives is in connection and conversation with other women.
For 1000’s of years, women have squatted around campfires solving the problems within their village, marriage, family and life.
Discussing it together.
Women have always been connected beings.
Connectedness and sisterhood is woven into the fundamental nature of women.
We turn to our friends and neighbours for support.
We just don’t “do” challenges alone.
So to be told that you have all the answers within you can be really insulting.
We know that.
We just need a little help to draw them out.
We need a mentor.
A friend.
A sister who can see what we can’t see.
Someone to figure it out with.
Because that is what us women have been doing for generations.
So, ladies, let us stick together.
To continue to be there for each other.
Let us use discernment on who to turn to and where to turn to.
And discernment on the advice we receive.
Helena Ryan lives in Brisbane Australia with her husband, son and border collie. She works with clients all around the world and is a manifesting master. When she’s not working she’s reading books, going camping or bushwalking or playing diggers with her son in the sandpit. She loves to garden and travel. She has served in the Australian Army and spent a decade as a Primary School Teacher. In 2011 she helped her husband clear his cancer, a 6x4x2” tumour around his lungs.
P.S. If this resonated with you, I work with female entrepreneurs from all around the world to identify how their ancestral lineage is impacting their business and their personal life. I offer a free 30 minute Compatibility Conversation where you can find out more about clearing your ancestral lineage or follow me on my Facebook Page.